Looking Good

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Image result for weaponized cosmetics

 The witch turned to face the evil dragon, wand ready for battle.

"Wait a minute," she said holding up her hand.

The witch conjured up her make-up purse, refreshed her lipstick, and a quick brush to her coiffure.

The astonished dragon stared at the witch as he furiously spouted flames and smoke.

"What?" she said to the dragon, "Of course I will save the boy, but I don't have to look poorly doing it."

She dabbed powder on her nose, then slipped her make-up purse into her robes.

“OK. Let's get this done."

With that, the battle began.

The dragon flapped his huge wings twice, generating a swirling windy vortex that disheveled the witch's hair. The dragon roared with laughter, flames and smoke spitting from his nostrils.

"How rude," declared the witch. "Stop at once!" she said, holding up her hand.

The witch retrieved her brush, repaired her coiffure. She pulled out hair spray, finishing the job with a heavy dousing.

"There, much better," said the witch just before she threw her hair brush at the dragon.

The brush grew to one hundred times its original size and began to beat the dragon on the head with its hard wooden edge. The dragon roared in pain and shot flames at the hair brush burning it to a crisp.

The witch pulled out a nail clipper from her make-up purse and threw it at the dragon.

The nail clipper split into a horde of fifty clippers and attacked the dragon. The dragon flapped his wings furiously and missed swatting down the clippers. The clippers pecked at the dragon's claws, nipping them down to nubs. *

The witch threw her face-powder compact at the dragon. The compact exploded into a cloud about the dragon's head, blinding him and clogging up his fire breathing nostrils. The dragon fell to the ground choking.

"Now let see," said the witch as she rummaged through the items in her make-up purse. "Ah, just the thing," and she threw her nail polish at the dragon.

The nail polish bottle broke open and a giant brush began to paint the dragon's scales a lovely Mother-of-Pearl color. The nail polish hardened into a beautiful shell, encasing and immobilizing the dragon.

The witch stood over the dragon admiring her handiwork.

"Hmm, something is missing," she said as she stroked her chin in contemplation. I know..."

The witch knelt down, and reaching to the dragon, began applying red lipstick.
____________
Note from Vol-E: And now you know why the Transportation Safety Administration won't let you bring nail clippers onto a plane...

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